Mediation Benefits for Parents
Though divorce has gotten a reputation for causing long-term damage to children that follows them into adulthood - impacting their self-esteem, motivation, and intimate relationships - it turns out that divorce, in and of itself, isn’t the problem. Though some level of pain and confusion is inevitable, 40 years of research has shown that children of divorce can be just as successful in their careers and relationships as their counterparts.
Divorce isn’t the problem. How parents divorce is.
When kids feel they have to choose sides, they feel themselves divide. When a child hears a parent they love put down by the other parent, it is as if there is something wrong with part of themselves. When a child feels icy silence every time they are dropped off to the other parent’s house, they lose a sense of having a warm and safe home.
The job of parents going through separation and divorce is to ensure that their children can freely love both of their parents. This is easily said but incredibly hard to do.
You helped me feel better when I got angry. Mediation really helped me keep my focus on my children’s best interests. - 42 year old father
Mediation is valuable for parents and their children because it maintains communication and assists the transformation of the parenting relationship. Instead of adding a confusing adversarial process on top of what is already one of the most difficult experiences a person can have, mediation helps parents form a new co-parenting relationship through communication, respectful negotiation, and building clear and practical agreements that work for you and your children.